Tuesday, September 21, 2004

The days go by

So tell me, aren't we all just hired hands working on those dreams we plan to try? But, at least for me, sometimes it's just so hard to get going. It used to be different, but used to be's don't really matter anymore. The good news is I can feel it coming. Something different. Something exciting. Something, well, it's about damn time! So hold on tight and enjoy the right!

Henry David Thoreau said "simplify your life". It has really stuck with me over the years. But other than knowing that little piece, I never really took the time to read his work. If I did I probably wouldn't like it much, but maybe... just maybe, I would.

For tonight, since I'm in a retrospective mood, I'll leave you with this:

A young boy traveled across Japan to the school of a famous martial artist. When he arrived at the dojo he was given an audience by the sensei. "What do you wish from me?" the master asked. "I wish to be your student and become the finest karateka in the land," the boy replied. "How long must I study?". "Ten years at least," the master answered. "Ten years is a long time," said the boy. "What if I studied twice as hard as all your other students?" "Twenty years," replied the master. "Twenty years! What if I practice day and night with all my effort?" "Thirty years," was the master's reply. "How is it that each time I say I will work harder, you tell me that it will take longer?" the boy asked. "The answer is clear. When one eye is fixed upon your destination, there is only one eye left with which to find the Way."

Until next time!


Wednesday, September 08, 2004

That's just the way it is

Sometimes it just doesn't matter... I had a post all ready to go this morning. I'm not saying that it was going to change the world. In fact, I'm not even certain anyone even reads my rants. Still, it was something. For some reason the stupidometer was in high gear, and stayed that way all day! I went to post the article and it just kept "working...". Finally I figured something must be wrong, so I hit the button on the browser, figuring I could just resubmit. Nope - cleared out everything I had written. Lost forever. The rant that never was. Now, instead, you get this. To you, the avid reader, it may not make that much difference. Hey, a post is a post. But for me, well, truth be told, it doesn't make that much difference either. It just gave me more to write about.

Speaking of writing, I was playing in a poker tournament tonight. It was a 3-table tournament - 30 people. It was a $5 entry fee, and the top 5 positions paid out. About 3/4 of the way through I had to use the bathroom, no questions asked. So I checked the box to post blinds and fold, since I'd be away from the table. I get back a few minutes later, my bankroll sufficiently shrunk, to play another few hands. Then we get the noticed that it was time for all players to get a 5 minute break. Damn! I forgot about the break, otherwise I would have tried to wait that extra few minutes.

Shortly thereafter, we were combined into the finally board and I was wiped off the table. I finished 9th out of 30, which overall is pretty good... but pretty good doesn't pay the bills. Then again, neither will winning a $5 poker tournament. Ah well, time to get on with life once again.

Until next time.

Let the day begin

Dum dee dum dum dum. I'm still here. Yesterday I was just so tired! I tried going to bed several times last night. The first time it was about 8pm. Yes, 8pm. Not exactly 8pm, I really didn't get too caught up in the details, but around 8pm. As soon as I was incoherent - you know, that amazing time between being awake and asleep, when all those crazy weird nonsensical visions somehow make perfect sense to you - the phone rang. Kip!

As these things go, I couldn't fall right back to sleep. I sat at my computer for about an hour before making my second attempt - at sleep. Before too long I once again enter my incoherent state... I think I even drift off sleep! Then the phone rings. It's 11pm. It's my brother. He's leaving for Florida at 5am and wants a suitcase. Completing that task, I head off for sleep one last time. I'm successful! It's morning.

Let the day begin.

Sunday, September 05, 2004

Maybe next time

My arm hurts! It's not the bruised, painful, did something stupid kind of hurt. This is the other kind. The "I slept on my stupid arm just because I could" kind of hurt that stays with you for half the day. I can't wait until it goes away.

I really wanted to have some cereal for breakfast this morning. Not just any cereal, I wanted Captain Crunch. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was those visions of crunch berries dancing in my head. I haven't had Captain Crunch in a few years now. In fact, I really haven't had cereal in a long time. Unfortunately, as of right now, I still haven't had cereal in a long time. Oh well, maybe next time.

I feel a little "blah" today. I think it's because I have no planned goals that really excite me. Maybe something will come up. If not then, oh well, maybe next time!

Until next time.

Take it away, Garth...

The thing I love the most about music is how much music is life. The lyrics draw us a picture while the music colors it. Music can express so many things. I love music! Right now I have a song by Garth Brooks stuck in my head. Probably because I haven't heard it in a while. That and I've been practicing another one of his songs on the guitar lately. What's the song singing in my head? It's "You Move Me":

This is how it seems to me
Life is only therapy
Real expensive
And no guarantee

So I lie here on the couch
With my heart hanging out
Frozen solid with fear
Like a rock in the ground

But you move me
You give me courage I didn't know I had
You move me
I can't go with you
And stay where I am
So you move me

This is how love was to me
I could look and not see
Going through the emotions
Not knowin' what they mean

And it scared me so much
That I just wouldn't budge
I might have stayed there forever
If not for your touch

Oh but you move me
Out of myself and into the fire
You move me
Now I'm burning with love
And with hope and desire
How you move me

You go whistling in the dark
Making light of it
Making light of it
And I follow with my heart
Laughing all the way

Oh 'cause you move me
you get me dancing and you make me sing
You move me
Now I'm taking delight
In every little thing
How you move me

It's a pretty song, and I just love the beginning. Life is only therapy - how true! Speaking of therapy, it's time for me to get some sleep. Tomorrow is a new beginning and I'm very excited about it!

Nothing feels much better than a morning in September
That's what I remember most of all
And have I ever told you 'bout that one September morning
When my life changed from the summer to the fall

I finally solved the mystery of the autumn in New England
That has brought so many people stopping by
Who's woods these are I think I know, but nobody is telling
I can see the colors changing through my eyes

But before the winter comes I hope to find a new tomorrow
The one I know that I'll remember most of all
Before I stop to tell you 'bout that one December evening
When the winter came to take away the fall

(c)09/05/2004 by Ed Borowski

Once again, have a good night!

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Hello World!

I used to be a computer programmer, now I'm just a slog. Not just any kind of slog mind you. Nope, I'm a 100 percent pure slog in the intransitive sense. Definition # 1 to be exact. "to plod heavily". I had to clarify because, much to my surprise, being a slog is much more complicated than I thought. For some unknown reason, nothing in my life is easy. You'd think that being a slog would be easy. Nope. I was surprised at all the different ways that being a slog really doesn't sound all that bad. Here's what Merriam-Webster has to say about it:

Main Entry: 1slog
Pronunciation: 'släg
Function: verb
Inflected Form(s): slogged; slog·ging
Etymology: origin unknown
transitive senses
1 : to hit hard : BEAT
2 : to plod (one's way) perseveringly especially against difficulty
intransitive senses
1 : to plod heavily : TRAMP <slogged through the snow>
2 : to work hard and steadily : PLUG
- slog·ger noun

Now I'm going to mysteriously change the subject and act like we never talked about it. So I had this weird dream last night. I dreamt that I bought two new motorcycles. I was very excited. My brother bought one too. His was a Honda 250cc offroad. Pretty cool bike. Mine weren't Honda, though we purchased them at the same place. Oddly enough, we purchased them in the basement of our house on Bridge Street in Northampton (yes - I realize that I've never lived on Bridge Street in Northampton). One of the bikes that I purchased was also a 250cc offroad, the other was an on-off road bike. It was interesting because it looked more like a 10-speed bike than a motorcycle. I wanted to return it! Jim also kept his bike in our basement. I have no idea why.

On that note, time to start the day. I kicked some ass in poker last night! I came in 1st in my 1st tournament and 2nd in my second.

Until next time!

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

I'm back baby, I'm back!

You'll be happy to know that my back keeps getting better. I'm actually moving around much better today than I have all week. I'm hoping to stop taking the medication soon, it really wipes me out by the afternoon.

My luck at poker continues. This evening when I got home from work I hung out with my brothers dog for a little while, but after that I snuck in a quick poker tournament before my guitar lesson. I came in 1st. My winning streak continues.

Started working on "Friends in low places" by Garth Brooks. The Intro is much harder than it sounds! Still, it's a fun song. Hopefully I can finally get myself to practice some before next week. One of these days I still have hopes of being able to play some songs.

Hope you're all having a good week!